most likely to succeed

Last weekend I went to Flagstaff for a retreat with the Wesley Foundation. One of the devotions we did mentioned the idea of success. Our culture is obsessed with success. We go to school and to work so we can "be successful." We give up time, money, relationships, health, and more, all in the name of success. But what does it even mean to be successful? Does it mean having a lot of money and a comfortable lifestyle? Does it mean earning the highest degree from the most prestigious school? Does it mean finding the most marriage-able significant other or searching for fairy-tale endings? Is it still success if you have these things, but feel empty inside?

What are we willing to sacrifice to become successful? How do we know when we have "reached success?"

These ideas resonated with me, especially since as a high school senior I was voted "most likely to succeed." Who knows how collective these decisions really are, but that hasn't stopped it from putting pressure on me from time to time. Sometimes I would wonder to myself, but what if I'm not successful? What if I am a complete failure? I would feel like I had somehow thrown my life away, going from "most likely to succeed" to "utter failure."

I think this is why defining success is so important. If I don't take the time to think about the meaning of success, I will become swept up by the definition of success based on cultural and media ideas. I will subconsciously think that status symbols like money, fame, prestige, level of education, attractiveness, and so on are the marks of success.

In reality, I do not think attaining any number of these things brings true success. I have found that when I do not have a growing relationship with God (and if it isn't growing it's fading--there is no in-between), I feel inexplicably empty, regardless of how many marks of worldly success I have under my belt. And if I feel empty, even with the world saying, "Look how successful you are!", well, I think they're wrong.

I think success is feeling whole, and I think feeling whole comes from healthy relationships with God and with other people. I think success is being willing to struggle and strive to keep going, even when it seems like nothing matters. I think success is having faith in your darkest and most hopeless moments, the type of faith that is merely a belief that someday you will have hope again. And for this kind of success, for a relationship with God, I hope I am willing to give up everything.

I might not be most likely to become a CEO, a politician, a model, a famous scientist, or a movie star, but if I am defining success as being whole through God, as having a willingness to struggle, and keeping faith in the darkest times, then with God I am most likely to succeed.

Sidenote: know I have not posted yet this year; I have many things to share and hope to give these updates ASAP!